STRUCTURE FIRE!!!

Friday was a long day.  I wasn't feeling well and finally made it through my daily duties.  Unfortunately my day wasn't over since I had offered to make breakfast for my crew on Saturday morning.  I couldn't have picked something simple like bacon and eggs or something.  No, instead I created these great breakfast buns from scratch and ended up in the kitchen kneading dough till 10:30pm.  Obviously my intention of going to bed early were out the window.  Oh well, at least I would get to sleep in till 8:30am.

Well, that was my intention.  Two hours after I crawled into bed, at 12:30 am my pager went off.  As I followed my routine, stumbling around grabbing a shirt, cell phone, truck keys, pager I heard that it was a confirmed structure fire.  My first thoughts were "I still feel like junk, how on earth am I going to get through this?"  By the time I got to the hall dawned my gear and jumped in the truck, my thoughts were no longer on feeling junky.

We arrived on scene and I was immediately told to help bag the hydrant.  Something I have never done before.  From there a partner and I became RIT team one and we hung by the door waiting incase they needed us to go in and help.  The flames were visible inside the building and shooting out side the roof.  From there I was sent to the back to help with ventilation, sent to the front to help feed the hose into the building, back on RIT and finally Attack team one to do a thorough search of the basement.

As I entered the building and was sounding the floor all my days of training came to this one point.  We neared the seat of what was once the fire and the mug sitting on the table, with bubbling liquid in it showed us just how hot this place was.  We made our way to the basement and in midst of our search found a cat.  A live cat to be exact.  I was so determined to make sure that I made it out those doors with that cat that I squeezed it for dear life.  The hissing, writhing and clawing made it all that much more difficult to get back up the stairs and out the door.

By the time the fire was out and everyone was packing up, my adrenaline dropped and the cold, damp air settled in.  I was volunteered to hang around with DC to keep an eye on the place in case there was another flare up.  It was now 5:00 am and the hustle and bustle was done and gone.  Coyotes echoed off in the distance and we stood, staring at the remains of what once was a home of safety.  By this time, exhaustion was setting in, I was cold, tired and I had to pee.  Finally we were released and sent back to the hall to finish cleaning up.

By 6:00 am I was crawling back into my nice warm bed succumbing to the depths of sleep.  Unfortunately a chill of standing outside had set in my bones and I was unable to sleep deeply.  2 hours later, my pager went off and it was out the door  again to another structure fire.  Thank God it was a false alarm but it only meant that I was gypped again of another hour of sleep and it was time to head back to the hall for 3 hours of maintenance.

Here I am, two days later, my sleep is caught up, I now have laryngitis ;), and I was able to spend yesterday evening snuggled in by the fire watching a movie with the family.  As I recap my weekend I think ...  This is what I signed up for.  This is what is going to make my body ache, open my eyes to things I wouldn't normally see, and sometimes keep me from my family.

This is everything I anticipated it to be, and so much more.  I love it!!

3:00am wake up call

There are many things that could drag my butt out of bed at 3:00am.  A holiday being the best and a sick kid being the worst.  Neither of these woke me up this morning.  Instead it was Blaine's blaring pager.  Since he was injured with a spasm in his neck it was my wifely duty to cover for him.  Normally a lift assist is just that, assisting EMS with someone who needs to be picked up off the floor, lifted onto a stretcher or carried out to the ambulance.  This morning was a rare call, one that I will cherish forever.  What are the chances of a lady just delivering a beautiful baby boy and us being called into help?  Well apparently my chances were high this morning.  A very special treat indeed.  Welcome to the world little man.

I wish!

Two lives ... One a man, the other a woman.  Both have lived a good life, full of experience and memories.  Some of those moments were trials, some were sadness, but most were treasures.  One life is tainted with the scars of cancer the other life tainted with both scars and hidden remains.  The days seem so long lately.  Weakness presses in.  As the man looks out the window, with the sun setting above the trees. He can't help but share his thoughts. " I wish that God would come right now and bring us both to heaven so that we don't have to be apart and go through anything without the other."  She can't help but smile as her eyes begin to glisten ... The words so softly spoken were like music to her ears.  "I know."  She replies As she struggles to swallow the flood of tears.  Words that once were spoken to her come to her mind again ... Treasure each and every day with him.  "Me too!"  She says.  "Me too!"

Sometimes

Sometimes I wish I wasn't so sensitive.  Sometimes I wish that I didn't toss stupid things I say and do over and over in my head.  I wish that stupid things didn't get under my skin and bring me to tears.  Sometimes I wish I was more like a turtle where I could just duck my head in my house and not worry about what others think of me.  Sometimes I wish that I could just brush things off and not care if they were intended to hurt me.  I wish that I didn't read into others actions so much.  Sometimes I wish that I wasn't quick to open my mouth and share what is going on in my head.

Sometimes I wish that I were somebody I am not.

A prayer for Avery

On October 7, 2010 I opened my heart and amongst many, many others prayed a prayer for Gideon who was born with hypophosphatasia  Nothing shy of a miracle could save that babies life ... but God heard our prayers and he did just that.  God performed a miracle and today Gideon is a normal, healthy, crawling, squealing, rambling 16 month old.

This is Avery!  I wrote about her a couple of posts ago and even though is has been a couple of weeks since I learned of Avery's news I am still just as upset about it.   Avery is 14yrs old and recently found out that she has Ewing's Sarcoma.  Avery always held a special place in my heart and has touched it in so many ways.  There isn't an hour that goes by throughout the day when I don't think of Avery.  Tears sting my eyes when I look at her sweet face and imagine the pain that she is going through. My heart aches when I read her mom's email updates filled with openness on exactly how they are feeling.  I feel so helpless.  I can't even fathom how this could happen.  The MRI's have shown that the cancer remains in one area.  Today Avery had a bone marrow biopsy and they are awaiting the results.  Tonight Avery starts a very long process of Chemo.

I pray that through all of this, Avery will be surrounded with peace.  I pray that the Chemo going in will do it's job and flush out of her body before even a symptom will be felt, and that every strand of hair on her head will remain.  I pray a protection over every single healthy cell in her body, and that her bone marrow will go untouched.  Most of all, I pray that Avery's health will return, the cancer will diminish and the sparkle in her eyes will remain.   May God provide Avery with a long healthy life just like he has begun with Gideon.  

If you were to walk into my house right now you would have no idea that I was home all day.   Tonight you would find an entry way scattered with soggy mitts, wet snow pants and pieces of scattered snow.  A box of unmatched socks would welcome you as you sat on the couch amongst the bits and pieces of the new 'lego friends' who are visiting the 'pirate of the Caribbean' gang.

If we found the time to indulged in some adult conversation I am sure we would be quickly interrupted with the buzzer update of the current hockey game score coming from the ipod charging on the floor, and of course I would have to warn you that you will most definitely find a half a dozen cowboy, sniper, dart or pistol guns scattered between the bedrooms and living spaces, and don't be surprised if you find the odd piece of laundry lying about or even dirty dishes in the sink.

The part that you would have missed is watching kids play some military game outside in the snow while the two youngest kids played Lego together.  Your life may have been even better and fuller knowing that your favorite team lost yet another game.  Did you notice the walkway shovelled clear for your visit?  Or the play room now a bit more neater.   The best part will be tomorrow when at three different instances all three kids will go riffling through that box of unmatched socks filled with frustration as they 'can't find one pair'.  Now close you eyes and smell the faint hint of freshly baked cookies or hear the soft noises of someone playing in bed as they try and fall asleep.  Now you understand why my house is a shambles even after I didn't work today.  :)  Thanks for the visit.